Hit hard just now

[cheeseczar]

For some reason this morning, a restaurant my Parents used to take me to popped into my head.
I could not for the life of me remember the name of it. One of those deals that you just can't let go of
until you get the answer. So then I thought about calling my Sister. But she was way too young to remember
the name of the place. My Brother wasn't even a thought back then.

And then it hit me. Dad has been gone 5 years and Mom just passed in April. There is nobody in this world that
I can call to remember things from my childhood.

Just...wow.

(for what it's worth, I remembered it is the Timberline Inn, Dowagiac, Michigan)

[rrrr]

There's something I want to ask my Mom, been thinking about it for months.

It's not a pleasant feeling.

[cheeseczar]

The grieving has been done.

This is not something I was prepared for.

[beej]

I know what you mean, and I think we sort of get prepared for the obvious grieving, special dates, holidays, all of the firsts...

what we can never prepare for are those things that sneak up on us, the things that really can't be explained... a special smell, or food, or... a special restaurant....

The obvious grieving passes, not sure that the we ever stop grieving those things we can't always explain.

Blessings...

[rockawaygirl]

After my Mom died I remembered my Dad being really depressed. I understood the reason or thought I did. After a few months my Dad explained to me that when my Mom died he lost more than his wife of 35 years and friend of 45 years. He lost a whole history of memories that only my mother could share with him. I understood that fully when my Dad died three years later. Although I still can talk about childhood memories with my brother, there were a lot of situations, conversations, and memories that only my Dad and I shared. I can explain them to others, but they don't have the same connection and the moment is lost on them. it's very sad and humbling.

[nm]

Take it from me, my friend, few things will ever impact you as much as losing your second parent. The internal grieving last a long time. I should have gone to free grief counseling near here, but did not. That was a mistake.

[BigWheelHawaii]

Sometimes grief hit's like a arrow shot,,,
one that hit's you square in the heart,
when you least expect it... Years can
pass, but it's never ends,,, out of the
dark, and it hits for no explainable
reason...

Sorry Cheese,,,

[Unzerdog]

I'm just the guy that needed to read this today. I haven't seen my Mom in a year since she moved to Florida. I haven't seen my Dad in 3 years, but spent four hours on the phone with him yesterday. The smartest man I know. My Mom got the call yesterday morning, my bookkeeper, she had to kick someones @zzz for me to collect. And my check was delivered within the hour. Not sure what she said, but it worked. She's 67 and retired, but 2 weeks in Kabul working for US AID, she is tough as nails.

40 years old, and I still need mommy sometimes.

My heart is with you too Cheeze. To a far lesser degree, It's just over month now since losing my boy, Unzer dog. Right now I'm cooking a pork roast, and it just isn't the same without him sprawled out in the kitchen next to the stove. Littlest of things that blind side you.

[mstove]

Always a good reminder to spend time talking with and appreciating our folks. Sorry, Cheeze.

[Frank Capua]

My Mom is 84 and not only is she still sharp enough to still be driving for Penske but she is my Go-To-Girl when I can't remember a name or a place from my youth. My cousins are always remarking on how good my memory when I bring up things from our past but they don't know how often Mom is my fact checker. I'm amazed by her memory and wonder what I'll do if we ever lose her...

Then I look at her... Look at me looking at her and realize I'll most likely be checking out before she does. But if I'm wrong I'll be lost.

[DavidM]

Its funny my wife and I were talking yesterday about my Grand Mother after watching Sunday Morning’s piece about a WWII vet learning to read at 90. My Grand Mother used to teach adults to read. My wife had a couple questions about my Grand Mother and it made me realize that with my Father and Uncle now gone that there was no one I could turn to get answers to those questions. I'm the oldest member of my family and there is very little I know or remember about my grandparent’s history. Made me a bit sad.