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(I'm sorry, but I had to tell someone)
A couple of weeks ago Mrs. Numb decides that she loves me so much that she plans a little excursion. We are to go into the big city to see a Pink Floyd laser Light Show. Included in the package is dinner, a hotel room for the night and the company of the Fun Couple: the Princess and her newly minted husband the T-Man.
So we drive to the city, check in, and then join the Fun Couple for an adult beverage before walking to the restaurant Mrs. Numb has chosen. And she chose well. We ate in moderation sharing little plates of this and that. The food was delicious. But it was duly noted that it was still Happy Hour and that we ought to order up before the prices expire. I had my usual G&T while the other sipped glasses of white wine.
When it was time to move on we continued walking until we arrived at the vicinity of the small entertainment venue---a club. I impress my love by asking directions without hesitation. We found it, entered and proceeded upstairs to where our seats would be. And there was the bar/lounge. A glitzy, twinkling all to new and spotless Gener X cave which tonight was awash with the sounds of King Crimson. And we had time for another adult beverage
Soon it was time to find our seats put on our 3-D glasses and enjoy the show, which started with the complete Dark Side of the Moon, complete with clips from The Wizard of Oz. And we did. And Mrs. Numb did. In fact she climbed out of her normally cheerful but reserved persona and I believe was channeling the young thing I never had the opportunity to know. At least I think that is who it was who was standing for most of it and whooping.
Intermission arrived. Now I know for a fact I heard someone say just get one and we can share it---it was either the Princess or the T-Man. But it was Mrs. Numb who led the contingent back into the lounge where she ordered four more beverages for our apparently thirsty party. Someone kept coaching the bartender with the words, "Big pour, big tip."
I know it wasn't me.
We took the life sustaining liquids back to our seats for the second act. About 20 minutes into it I see Mrs. Numb and the Princess exit. Probably a trip to the powder room I surmised. Wrong, buffalo breath. They return with four more beverages and I am beginning to think that I should check I.D.s to see who I am with.
I'm not sure how much later, but the mood changed. The Princess is sitting with her elbow of the chair arm and her head in her hand. Mrs. Numb is not dancing anymore. The Princess gets up again and the T-Man follows. Now Mrs. Numb is listing to starboard. Soon she says, take me home. So I guide her out of the seats, thru the lounge and down to the ground floor. I suggest that we get a cab, but she says no, she can walk and besides the fresh air will do her good.
What ensued was a march which was punctuated by my blatant lies of, "One more block." But we made it, though she almost took a serious mis-step in front of the hotel. But we make it to our room where she immediately collapses on the bed. It is now that I realize that training as a nurse or as a funeral home attendant would come in handy because this little girl is not going to move anything. So I get her ready for bed. The good news is that she made it all the way without getting sick. The bad news is that she made it all the way without getting sick. Yeechhh...
But I take care of business knowing full well that I have scored enough points tonight to last me thru the end of next year. And that is when I start getting text messages from the T-Man. So I going sit in the bathroom so as not to disturb my love's beauty sleep, and call him to compare notes about this insanely romantic evening. He too evacuated his love. Apparently the Princess went and climbed into the first cab she saw, disregarding that there was someone already in it. He decided to move on and the fun couple rode back to the hotel. There he propped her on a bench to wait while he paid the driver. The Princess must have known that it would not be good form to get sick in her room and so she decided to do it right there.
The next morning the T-Man starts texting me about breakfast options---the Princess is hungry. I tell him to go ahead. We're not going anywhere yet, and I have no idea when we will be able to leave. Poor Mrs. Numb. her head is pounding, the room still doesn't want to stand still and her stomach feels like someone took a cheese grater to it. But she is strong enough to ask why I let her drink so much. It was only then that she learned that she had followed her glasses of Pinot Grigio with a couple G&Ts and the long forgotten admonishments about mixing drinks came flooding back.
I got Mrs. Numb safely out of the big city and she spent the rest of the day on the couch. And the next day as well. She has told me that she knows that I always control my intake of adult beverages, but that she never wants to drink anything again. "And another thing---not a word of this to anyone---not even your brother."
So I haven't told him...
A couple of weeks ago Mrs. Numb decides that she loves me so much that she plans a little excursion. We are to go into the big city to see a Pink Floyd laser Light Show. Included in the package is dinner, a hotel room for the night and the company of the Fun Couple: the Princess and her newly minted husband the T-Man.
So we drive to the city, check in, and then join the Fun Couple for an adult beverage before walking to the restaurant Mrs. Numb has chosen. And she chose well. We ate in moderation sharing little plates of this and that. The food was delicious. But it was duly noted that it was still Happy Hour and that we ought to order up before the prices expire. I had my usual G&T while the other sipped glasses of white wine.
When it was time to move on we continued walking until we arrived at the vicinity of the small entertainment venue---a club. I impress my love by asking directions without hesitation. We found it, entered and proceeded upstairs to where our seats would be. And there was the bar/lounge. A glitzy, twinkling all to new and spotless Gener X cave which tonight was awash with the sounds of King Crimson. And we had time for another adult beverage
Soon it was time to find our seats put on our 3-D glasses and enjoy the show, which started with the complete Dark Side of the Moon, complete with clips from The Wizard of Oz. And we did. And Mrs. Numb did. In fact she climbed out of her normally cheerful but reserved persona and I believe was channeling the young thing I never had the opportunity to know. At least I think that is who it was who was standing for most of it and whooping.
Intermission arrived. Now I know for a fact I heard someone say just get one and we can share it---it was either the Princess or the T-Man. But it was Mrs. Numb who led the contingent back into the lounge where she ordered four more beverages for our apparently thirsty party. Someone kept coaching the bartender with the words, "Big pour, big tip."
I know it wasn't me.
We took the life sustaining liquids back to our seats for the second act. About 20 minutes into it I see Mrs. Numb and the Princess exit. Probably a trip to the powder room I surmised. Wrong, buffalo breath. They return with four more beverages and I am beginning to think that I should check I.D.s to see who I am with.
I'm not sure how much later, but the mood changed. The Princess is sitting with her elbow of the chair arm and her head in her hand. Mrs. Numb is not dancing anymore. The Princess gets up again and the T-Man follows. Now Mrs. Numb is listing to starboard. Soon she says, take me home. So I guide her out of the seats, thru the lounge and down to the ground floor. I suggest that we get a cab, but she says no, she can walk and besides the fresh air will do her good.
What ensued was a march which was punctuated by my blatant lies of, "One more block." But we made it, though she almost took a serious mis-step in front of the hotel. But we make it to our room where she immediately collapses on the bed. It is now that I realize that training as a nurse or as a funeral home attendant would come in handy because this little girl is not going to move anything. So I get her ready for bed. The good news is that she made it all the way without getting sick. The bad news is that she made it all the way without getting sick. Yeechhh...
But I take care of business knowing full well that I have scored enough points tonight to last me thru the end of next year. And that is when I start getting text messages from the T-Man. So I going sit in the bathroom so as not to disturb my love's beauty sleep, and call him to compare notes about this insanely romantic evening. He too evacuated his love. Apparently the Princess went and climbed into the first cab she saw, disregarding that there was someone already in it. He decided to move on and the fun couple rode back to the hotel. There he propped her on a bench to wait while he paid the driver. The Princess must have known that it would not be good form to get sick in her room and so she decided to do it right there.
The next morning the T-Man starts texting me about breakfast options---the Princess is hungry. I tell him to go ahead. We're not going anywhere yet, and I have no idea when we will be able to leave. Poor Mrs. Numb. her head is pounding, the room still doesn't want to stand still and her stomach feels like someone took a cheese grater to it. But she is strong enough to ask why I let her drink so much. It was only then that she learned that she had followed her glasses of Pinot Grigio with a couple G&Ts and the long forgotten admonishments about mixing drinks came flooding back.
I got Mrs. Numb safely out of the big city and she spent the rest of the day on the couch. And the next day as well. She has told me that she knows that I always control my intake of adult beverages, but that she never wants to drink anything again. "And another thing---not a word of this to anyone---not even your brother."
So I haven't told him...
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